Discourse

Following up my first ideas of split-personalities whilst I am speaking
(and writing and thinking)
in another language, comes another one that intrigued me. I realized that in colloquial conversation I tend to use plenty of lines from musicians, writers and movies that I am particularly fond of
(sometimes it bothers me so much because i end up feeling that i am not able to speak for myself only through others'. i remember talking about love and being told
in between of not finding true love i'm enjoying the fake ones
and thinking what an amazing line that is and yet again i was not able to summoned it up myself)
. Partially I feel as if my own split-personality came from Hollywood, britpop independent trends and so on and so forth. English language trends, I suppose.
Sometimes I hear or read and find extremely poetic, like these two verses from Death Cab For Cutie's Transatlanticism
(was standing on the surface of a perforated sphere when the water filled every hole and thousands upon thousands made an ocean making islands where no island should go)
but never will I find the appropriate occasion to use them; somehow, in my head, the become a little bit useless and I have to make an enormous effort not to let them slip from my memory. I can actually make sense from it
(or at least and up to a very small extension i can)
and find intellectual elation from the fact that I can understand something written cryptically
(i think i can call poetic cryptic for poetry and most of the language conveyed through literature is essentially about metaphors or symbols and some things that stand for others)
. One can always find something to relate with, but I am so afraid of over-interpretation, of taking hermeneutics a step too far. Take, for example, this verse: “oh, the ocean smells like my mother who should love me, oh, like the ocean does”. Knowing the personal and cultural constraints around the group that sings this song, I can easily make some sense out of it
(i don't follow the post-modern prerogative that states the death of the author first because i don't believe in post-modernism and then because one cannot chastise the text from it's author)
. Nonetheless, I feel uncomfortable with my own interpretation, for it is my own and can be completely departed from reality.

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